I honestly can't believe that, in the year 2019, there is still a stigma around formula feeding your baby. Becoming a mum, especially for the first time, is already a huge challenge without external societal pressures based around feeding choices. As a baby I was fully fed on formula and how is it that, 26 years on, when I make the same decision for my little one it's still a bit of an awkward topic. So I wanted to write a little something in the hope it might remove even the tiniest bit of stigma for anyone choosing formula.
I knew from early on in my pregnancy that I wanted to formula feed Violet from the very start.
My reasons for this decision were pretty much all based around my mental health. I suffer with depression with the odd bout of anxiety thrown in and I knew that those early newborn days would already be a challenge for my brain, feeding aside. I just felt that adding the pressure of breastfeeding in to the mix wouldn't help. If I was to breastfeed I know I would be constantly worrying if she was getting enough milk in those early days. Formula feeding would also mean that the feeding responsibilities could be halved more easily between Jeff and I. Which meant more sleep for me. Which meant I would be more chilled. Bascially, I just knew it was the right decision for me. Anyone who believes 'Breast is best' will mention about breastmilk containing everything your baby needs, more so than formula does. Formula contains everything your baby needs but in my situation I saw it as two options: breastfeed and be a stressed out mumma or opt for formula and be more relaxed and present for Violet. I would make the same decision a thousand times over as it was right for me.
Fed really is best. If breastfeeding empowers you and feels the right decision for you then that's so awesome and I honestly think you are incredible. If you can't breastfeed or choose not to, whether from the start or further along your journey then you are equally as amazing. We should be empowering one another's decisions and respecting that everyone's parenting choices are theirs to make.
Our local midwife was so supportive of our decision and was bloody amazing. But unfortunately, the first health visitor we encountered was very much from team 'Breast is best'. She came out while I was pregnant and she left us with a big stack of leaflets about the benefits of breastfeeding and a sense weighing down on us that we were already bad parents before our baby had even arrived. Thanks to our lovely followers on Instagram when we mentioned this encounter we were left reassured by lots of sparkly people and were encouraged to ask for a new health visitor, which we did, and the new one is lovely.
There were a few other comments during my pregnancy when I was vocal about choosing formula, interestingly enough mainly from men, saying that I could at least try breastfeeding. After that initial health visitor encounter I now felt I should stand my ground and made sure to tell anyone where to go who had an issue with it!
So whatever you decide, you are an incredible mumma. You are nourishing a human life and you get to look into their eyes and watch them grow up from feed to feed, that doesn't change whether its breast or bottle or tube. You are bloody incredible. Mums, lets empower other mums and together we will be even more of a force to be reckoned with!
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